The heart really does want what it wants.

It's a little passed one in the morning and the Selena Gomez song just came on my playlist along with a rush of emotions and thoughts all at the same time. Luckily, they are good thoughts. I've never felt such a connection to a song in my entire life. The Selena Gomez track described my relationship so perfectly that it literally took my breath away the second I heard it play. Especially the monologue she recites in the music video before the song plays. I cried and sent the song to my partner when we were going through one of the toughest times in our relationship. I think he was dumbfounded by the lyrics as well.

Relationships are never easy to keep up and a lot of work is needed from both parties in order to learn and come out stronger on the other side. Sure, struggles and obstacles from the past arise but the important thing is to tackle them together so that one person doesn't feel like they're carrying more on their shoulders. I've had to do a lot of soul searching and self reflection to see the immature and often time unfair ways that I can go about treating others. I still struggle with trust issues stemming from middle school that have magnified in my relationships since. The good thing about my current situation is that the man I'm with shows me patience and above all the kindness it takes for me to take down my walls; brick by brick. Although we may trip and stumble we always catch our balance and start to walk again. Sometimes it takes hours while other times it takes days but as long as the outcome we're both working towards is positive then we can survive anything. And we have.

We haven't seen each other in a few days and my stubborn arrogance has gotten the best of me but I am a work in progress and I have to remember that so is he. I would do anything for him and still look at him with the same love in my eyes as I did the first night I realized, and verbalized, that I loved him. I know he loves me too and that's all I need at this time. Well, that and some rest seeing as I have to get an early start tomorrow for work. Our kids are promoting and moving on from the safety of a middle school they know to a high school that's completely foreign to them and I couldn't be prouder to have seen them grow into the young adults they're becoming.

Good night world!

P.S.,
In case you haven't heard it already or just need a good cry here's the video for Gomez's "The Heart Wants What It Wants."